檳榔嶼

Introduction
- A career was consider something to fall back on for the unlucky gal whose husband died or left her, or for those who couldn't find a husband at all. Men were supposed to be somebody. Women were supposed to find somebody.
- It's still women, however, who are epxected to sacrifice their ambition and earning power when they conflict with family expectations and pressures.
- The structure and policy of organization must shift to reflect the most basic of human realities - that parents need time for their jobs, time for their children, and time for themselves and each other.
- Work doesn't always go well, and wouldn't even in a world where discrimination and prejudice magically didn't exist.
- In the workplace it's more important to be respected thatn to be loved. And it's more important to be clear, direct, and principal than to have a nice day. It doesn't help to be conflict-avoidant, on the other hand, or too emotional, on the other.
- If we're convinced we can't live without our job, we can't really act on our principles or have a clear bottom line. Or a very nice day, for that matter.

How Much Do You Make?
- If we all shared our salaries (men, too), the information would empower us personally, and it would ultimately lead to fairer world.
- To refuse to reveal one's salary is simply to do what society teaches and, in many cases, what the boss expects, or even requires.
- It's naive to think that other women are there to empower you before you have earned their regard and trust.
- My own hope is that we all move toward greater openness when it comes to sharing information about what we make, and that we proceed with maturity and good judgment when we are entrusted with the information others reveal to us. We also need to examine our deepest anxieties about making money. Unlike men, women tend to price ourselves too low, feel grateful for too little, and not ask for more, even when it's there for asking. We may even feel that trying to make a lot of money is a bad thing.
- Sisterhood does not require us to "tell all" but rather to respect our differeces.

I Can't Believe I Was Fired
- Work is work. Family is family. We should never confuse them, even if our organization does.
  - Businesses do not exist to love and care for us.
- When a work system makes like it's family, don't believe it.

When the Lady Is Boss
- As a result, tokens typically end up either conforming to the stereotypes of their group or bending over backward to fight them.
- Don't set yourself up for the impossible by trying to raise the consciousness of your workplace all by yourself.
- At the gut level, resistance to female authority runs deep.

My Boss Is Too Critical
- When it comes to criticism, it is surely more blessed to give than to receive.
- Fair or not, though, the only thing we can control and change is our own behavior. We cannot respond to criticism.
- Don't defend yourself when you're being criticized. Instead, listen respectfully and ask questions. Give yourself time to consider the feedback before telling your side.
- Don't criticize a person who is trying to criticize you. Choose another time to voice your grievances and complaints.
- Don't state your own position until you can do so calmly, without blaming or putting down the criticizer. When you're feeling intense, remember that old maxim in reverse: "Don't just do something, stand there!"
- Don't bring up everything. Take a clear stand on important issues, and let the rest go.
- At work, behaving strategically rather than spontaneously isn't dishonest - it's realistic.

I'm So Humiliated
- The only way we can totally protect ourselves from humiliation is by not trying to do anything challenging. 

Is Volunteer Work a Good Thing?
- We'd all do well to keep in mind that we can't really know with certainty what is right or best for another person.
- Close friendships can thrive only when there is room for difference and disagreement; simply let your friend know your position without criticizing or blaming her.
- We may fail to pay due respect to volunteerism because we have learned to undervalue what seems to come naturally to us and ot overvalue the competitive, hierarchical, profit-oriented vlaues of the dominant culture.

I Can't Stand My Supervisor
- When an organization is under stress, any one individual can easily become a candidate for an intensely negaative focus.
- Don't tell your supervisor that he's failing to appreciate you. You'll be seen as a complainer.

My Employee Has a Bad Attitude
- Don't analyze or diagnose your employees. Instead, clarify the rules and consequences.

I'm Paralyzed by Criticism
- Writing is an act of self-expression and self-discovery. 
  - There is no writing gene or publishing gene.
- In our product-oriented society, we may forget that the process of writing is its own reward, particularl if this is your passion.

I'm a Homemaker and Proud of It
- Almost all fields of work that are predominantly female are underpaid and undervalued.
  - Although homemakers often work long hours, they are said "not to work". But this unfortunate state of affairs reflects patriarchy, not feminism.
  - It's not feminism, but rather the mainstream media, that has pitted "Moms" and "career women" against each other, deflecting us from working together to ensure the dignity and economic protection of all women.
- Motherhood has always been surrounded by an aura of romantic idealization, but mothers aren't truly valued.
- Being valued is wonderful, and it is essential to our well-being and self-esteem.

Promotion Anxiety
- Change is always stressful.
- Unlike men, who learn that "moving up" will enhance their self-esteem and strengthen their relationship, women learn the opposite. Many women unconsciously equate success with the loss of what they currently have and value - loss of approval, loss of attractiveness, even loss of significant relationships.
- Women receive countless mixed messages about success, from society and the key people in our lives.
  - A husband may genuinely encourage his wife but then react strongly if she starts making more money or garners more status than he does.
  - A mother may say, "Be successful!" but then ignore or undermine her daughter's success, because the mother herself has never been allowed to seek success or even acknowledge the wish for it.
- The more family facts you can gather, the move context you will have for understanding your struggle and the less anxious you will feel.